And Now His Watch is Dracary'ed

Game of Thrones

Episode 4: 

And Now His Watch Is Ended

Summary:

Jaime and Brienne are continuing their lovely sequence tour of the countryside.

Jaime looks blue. Mind you, so would you if you just lost the good hand that made you who you are.

The Bolton men give him horse piss to drink when he falls weak and exhausted from his horse.

They are Bolton Men. They are hardly going to be nice.

Jaime tries to fight them all with his left hand. It doesn't end well.

Locke threatens to take his other hand.

Brienne wants to snap everyone like a twig.

Meanwhile Tyrion visits Varys.

Varys tells him the story of how he was cut.

Varys heard a voice in the flames as his parts were sacrificed and now he hates magic.

And Melisandre. And Stannis.

Varys is keeping a man in a box.

The Sorcerer who cut him.

Thats gotta hurt.

Meanwhile, the Nights Watch are shovelling shit. Literally.

Sam and Gilly are discussing baby names. And rescuing of babies.

Bran is running. Bran is climbing a tree.

And Cat makes her son fall out of the tree?

Bad cat.

For some reason Varys and Ros are discussing Podrick.

And Littlefinger is taking someone away with him. I wonder who that could be?

Ros can read. Yay?

Joffrey is telling Margaery all about those who died in the Sept of Baelor.

Joffrey knows how to woo a girl.

Olenna and Cersei are bonding.

Over husbands and idiot sons apparently.

Margaery wants Joffrey to see the people.

Or she wants them to kill him. Either way he goes anyway.

The people are cheering for Margaery

Cersei is both jealous of Margaery and relieved that Joffrey is safe.

I sense a slap off in Season 4.

Meanwhile Theon is still travelling with that lovely helpful boy.

Theon laments and is then betrayed and taken back to the torture chamber by the lovely helpful boy.

Poor Theon.

Brienne gives Jaime an encouraging speech after he refuses to eat and then calls him a woman.

Naturally, Jaime starts eating.

Brienne then asks Jaime why he saved her from being raped.

He gives no answer.

The King Slayer is a man of hidden honour clearly.

Cersei meets with Tywin.

It goes...Awkwardly.

Apparently Cersei is the only one who ever listened to Tywin's lectures.

Cersei believes that Margaery is manipulating Joffrey.

Tywin tells Cersei that shes not as smart as she thinks she is.

Cersei is devastated but still she believes her dad can rein in Joffrey.

Good luck.

Olenna is pissed off with roses.

And then there's a spider in the garden.

Varys shares Littlefinger's plans with Olenna.

They agree that Littlefinger doesn't deserve possession of Sansa Stark: The Key to the North.

Repeat this with me all you Sansa haters:

Sansa is important.

Margaery: Master Manipulator is now gone after Sansa: She Who Prays to Tree Stumps.

For some reason Margaery is very hands on with Sansa.

Margaery was called pig face as a child?

I hope Cersei is out there taking notes.

Repeat after me:

Sansa is naive. Not stupid.

Margaery wants them to be good friends.

And the fangirls have fainted and exploded.

Cersei is going to be Queen Regent.

Boy, is she going to be pissed at that.

Margaery offers Loras to Sansa as a husband.

Is that not pimping your brother?

I'm sure thats pimping out your brother...

Meanwhile, the Nights Watch are having a lovely funeral for one of their own.

Craster wants them all to sod off now.

Someone calls Craster a daughter-fucking Wilding bastard.

And Craster gets killed. And Mormont gets killed too?

And everything goes tits up.

Sam takes Gilly and the baby and wisely buggers off.

Sam can run. Good.

The Brotherhood take a hooded Arya, Gendry and the Hound to their secret cave hideout.

The Hound recognises Beric Dondarrion and recognises the group as deserters.

The Brotherhood Without Banners fights against those who pray on the weak.

The Hound says its his brother Gregor they want.

Arya brings up the Butcher's Boy Mycah killed for nothing on Joffrey's orders.

Beric tells the Hound that the Lord of Light will judge him and challenges him to trial by combat.

Fight! Fight! Fight!

And here we are back in Nipple-Less town.

I mean Astapor.

Daenerys surrenders a dragon to Kraznys.

No. An actual dragon. There will be no more nipples... Sadly.

Slavers whip in hand and sudden Valyrian primed Dany gets everyones attention.

Orders the Unsullied to kill everyone who isn't a slave. And orders Drogon to barbeque Kraznys.

Daenerys tells the Unsullied that they are free to go or free to fight to her as free men.

They willingly follow her out of Astapor.

Review:

Seven Hells. This is an epic one isn't it?

Alliances are formed.

Alliances are broken.

Plots are made.

But what got me the most was the ending.

Dany became the ruthless conquerer her ancestors were in just a few well chosen words of Valyrian and a lot of fire and blood. Literally.

This made Season 3 for me.